Making the Transition to Living Together As Newlyweds
Getting married and moving in together is an exciting milestone in a relationship. However, it also brings many changes as two individuals adjust to sharing the same living space.
The transition can be challenging at first. Newlyweds must navigate compromising on decor, chores, finances, and more. With some planning and patience, couples can settle into married life under one roof.
In this blog article, we share 16 tips to help you adjust to newly married life.
1. Communicate Your Needs and Expectations
Open and honest communication is key before and after moving in together. Discuss your habits, preferences, pet peeves, and relationship dea lbreakers. This allows you both to understand and accommodate each other’s needs.
Set expectations for cleanliness, alone time, visitors, quiet hours, etc. Compromise where you differ. Frequently check in after moving to address any issues promptly.
2. Divide Up Household Responsibilities
Create a chore chart or schedule detailing who will handle what tasks and when. Split chores based on individual strengths and dislikes.
For example, if one spouse loves cooking and the other hates it, the former can handle all meal prep. Make sure duties are evenly distributed. Apps like Cozi can help you organize and track chores.
3. Create a Decorating Plan
Decor can be a huge source of contention for newlyweds. Discuss each other’s style and vision for the space. Make Pinterest boards to find everyday inspiration and make joint decor decisions.
Compromise by designating certain rooms for each person to take the lead on. Combine old and new pieces from both individuals. This creates a space in which you both feel at home in.
4. Set a Home Budget
Finances are often the biggest challenge for newly married couples. Create a shared budget accounting for joint expenses like rent, utilities, groceries, etc.
Determine who will pay for what. Apps like Honeydue allow you to track shared spending and sync your finances easily. Keep purchases under $50 discretionary or discuss bigger ones.
Agree on saving and spending habits. Financial openness prevents future conflicts.
5. Allow Private Spaces and Time Apart
It’s normal to crave alone time as you adjust to constantly being around your spouse in a shared space. Discuss allowing each other regular time to unwind alone at home.
Designate home areas as personal spaces, like a craft room or man cave. Plan regular date nights out to give you both a change of environment.
6. Combine Your Possessions Mindfully
Sort through your stuff and decide what you’ll keep when moving in together. Look for duplicate items like kitchen appliances to donate or sell.
Figure out storage solutions for sentimental or seasonal items. Use digital storage for photos. Display favorite knickknacks from both individuals.
Let go of items no longer needed to declutter your new abode. This prevents arguments over space.
7. Compromise on Cleanliness Standards
Everyone has different standards for cleanliness. One spouse may be tidier while the other is more relaxed.
Communicate your pet peeves, but don’t expect your partner to match your level. You may have to accept a “good enough” state to avoid nagging.
Focus on shared spaces and take turns deep cleaning the entire home. For private areas like desks, let it slide. Pick your battles and clarify what matters most.
8. Coordinate Your Sleeping Habits
Sharing a bed is very different from sleeping. Discuss your preferences and pet peeves around sleep.
Do you have different temperature and lighting needs? What are your must-haves, like a white noise machine orpile of pillows?
Accommodate each other’s schedules. Take turns wearing earplugs or an eye mask if needed. Invest in a mattress you both find comfortable.
9. Share the Cooking or Meal Plan Together
Cooking for two can be an adjustment, especially if one spouse is used to casual meals. Create a shared Google Doc or app for meal planning and grocery lists.
Take turns selecting meals and share cooking duties. Compromise on trying new recipes. Meal prep together on weekends for quicker weeknight dinners.
10. Make Quality Time for Your Marriage
It’s easy to get swept up in chores and responsibilities when newly living together. Make your marriage a priority by scheduling regular date nights, weekends away, and daily check-ins.
Don’t lose your couple’s identity amidst domesticity. Remain mindful of nurturing your romantic connection. The rest will follow.
11. Set Ground Rules
Sit down before the move-in and determine fundamental rules you both agree to uphold in your shared home. This provides a clear framework to avoid future conflict.
Potential ground rules include cleaning schedules, bathroom time limits, off-limit spaces, quiet hours, visitor policies, smoking areas if needed, and how you’ll handle conflict. Outline consequences for breaking major rules.
Revisit these every few months to modify as needed. Ground rules create a harmonious environment.
12. Be Prepared to Compromise
Viewing your spouse’s differing habits and preferences as a personal affront will brew resentment. Accept you won’t see eye-to-eye on everything.
Identify your non-negotiables, like smoking inside, then be ready to compromise on smaller quirks. Give a little to get a little.
Frequent compromise and empathy will make cohabitation pleasant for you both.
13. Respect Each Other’s Differences
While compromise is key, also embrace your differences. Don’t try to change your partner’s innate personality and habits.
Respect their unique rhythms like introvert versus extrovert needs. Allow them to maintain individual hobbies and friend groups.
Appreciate their distinct perspective even when you disagree. Your differences can strengthen your marriage.
14. Start New Traditions
Making new memories together marks the start of your life as a married couple. Brainstorm fun new regular activities like game nights, weekend hiking trips, trying new restaurants or volunteering together.
These meaningful rituals will become the basis for your own traditions as newlyweds.
15. Be Patient
Adjusting to married life at home won’t happen overnight. Prepare for a period of growing pains and friction as you navigate differences big and small.
Grant one another patience and grace during conflicts. Avoid keeping score or casting blame. Support each other through challenges with compassion.
With time, empathy and teamwork, you’ll establish a happy life together under one roof.
16. Don’t Be Afraid to Ask for Help
If you hit a rough patch transitioning to cohabitation, don’t be afraid to seek guidance. Ask experienced married friends and relatives for their wisdom.
Consider couples counseling to mediate major conflicts. Read self-help books on adjusting to married life together.
Seeking help early prevents small issues from ballooning into marriage-threatening ones. With support, this new chapter will be a fulfilling one.
Conclusion:
The shift from separate living to cohabitation presents new challenges for newly married couples. Compromise, empathy, and preserving your intimacy while allowing personal space will enable you to adjust over time.
Most importantly, communicate openly and honestly. Approach issues as partners tackling obstacles together rather than with frustration at your spouse. With understanding and effort, your new home will become a haven. Learn here more about newlyweds couple tips and guides.